Tabu, Nag and Love

Read news of Tabu getting married to one business man sometime early next year. A piece of gossip? Yes…but what really caused an interest is that the 40 year old has been in love with the 51 years Nag for the last 14 years!

When one thinks of marriage, one can only ruminate on what it means…no other living being is bound with such ties except the human being. Is it love that binds two in marriage? If yes, then why does one tire of the relationship? Nagarjuna was married once. I am not aware of the circumstance of his first marriage but the second one with Amala was surely one of love. Marrying her and bearing a child with her, what then drew him to Tabu while making the film “Ninne Pelladutha?”

A feeling of sympathy persists when you look at it from the wife’s perspective. The drama being drawn out in Prabu Deva’s case…married for 15 long years and with three children what now draws him to someone a good 11 years his junior?

Is it possible to logically analyze the feelings of love? Tabu who hasn’t sought any relationship beyond that of Nag’s, still will not bear him a child as the child will not have social sanction. And especially in the Indian context, one feels incomplete without a child to make up a family. Your heart does go out to Tabu when you see the emotional investment that a relationship involves. It must not be easy for Nag either to see her get married to someone else. But when you think of Amala…how do you justify these actions? Is something called ‘Love’ really the binding factor for marriage? Is that what keeps a relationship going? Then when does a person realize what’s really love? Wasn’t it love that bound Nag-Amala? Is love just a convenience? Someone you are attracted to till you find someone better? I find this quite bewildering and too complex to analyze.

If being in love gives you such a warm feeling, that you want to do things to make someone’s life worth living, how is this wrong? Should one denounce marriage as an artificially created social binding and keep seeking that love which can only fill you with warmth? Why does one feel compelled to bow oneself to social sanctions? It’s easy to say that it’s wrong to seek an extra marital relationship. But when in love, how do you make your heart listen to your mind?